On Teenage Girls And The Blogs That Transform Them

by Becky on October 25, 2012 · 8 comments

in Parenting

Palafrugell_4958

I have two daughters, both in their teens, both tall and statuesque.  (I know, I know, forgive me while I dote.)  Each is lovely in her own distinct way. Each has her own unique strengths and tastes. One adores vintage style and dreams about being an industrial designer. One listens to Bach while she does homework and occasionally breaks into song in cathedrals. My point: they’re different. As a result, sometimes they have to work to understand each other.

Which brings me to a phenomenon I’ll call “love” blogging. My older daughter, she of the waist-length hair and patrician features, stumbled upon an interesting blog recently. A Blog About Love chronicles the journey of a highly interesting couple whose first marriages ended and whose second marriage–to each other–has brought them not only happiness but wisdom, the pearls of which they share with those lucky enough to count themselves among the blog’s readership. But while it tends to focus on married love, the posts resonate on many levels. Indeed, my daughter has found the overall theme so inspiring that she now has resolved to be more loving and understanding, starting with her younger sister–a blue-eyed wisp of a thing who could easily have stepped out of a Celtic myth.

It’s impossible to overestimate the bandwidth of the love blog. Last night, for example, we were all sitting around as a family after finishing an exercise in Spanish reading and pronunciation (we’re living in Spain until next summer), and when my older daughter had an opportunity to get frustrated at something that might normally have prompted frustration, she turned to me with a smile, touched me lightly on the arm, and affirmed that she was choosing not to be bugged. “Since I’ve been reading A Blog About Love,” she reminded me, “I just want to be more loving to everyone.”

I know, right? The moment sounds almost cloying–like it could be fake!  But it wasn’t cloying.  And it most certainly wasn’t fake.  The evidence:  a seventeen-year-old girl chose love.  Because of a blog.  Naturally she was the greatest beneficiary.  After all, the kind of forbearance informed by the intention to practice love instead of something else always benefits the practitioner more than anyone else.

Thank you, authors of A Blog About Love.  Your message has currency, not only with the second-time-arounders but also with a much younger crowd as well, including a beautiful girl whose views of love have broadened as a result of having collided with you.  She, like your other readers, is gaining confidence that love is a verb–i.e., anyone can practice it with success.

miggy October 26, 2012 at 5:20 am

Wow…just hoped over from ABAL and am truly inspired by your daughter and her choices. What a great story. Hugs to you and yours.

R O X Y M A R J October 26, 2012 at 11:31 am

I saw that my friend Mara mentioned this post on her blog {blog about love} which has brought me to your blog. You are such a great writer. I wish I could write and explain my self as thoughtfully as you. :] I am always moved when I see sisters that are kind and loving to one another. I didn’t receive that from my older sister growing up and continued well into my late twenties… Her behavior towards me has always been baffling…and she is 8 years older than me, which makes it even more odd. I was lucky to have the opportunity to be a nanny in NY to two wonderful sisters who were and still are best friends. I felt like I got to be the loving older sister to them that I had longed so badly for in my own life…. It makes me happy inside to know that your oldest daughter is going to try and be more loving to her younger sister…. this will have HUGE repercussions when they are older…especially if they can become best friends. :)

Carolynn October 26, 2012 at 2:40 pm

Brilliant, beautiful blog! . . . Wondrous ‘wisp’,'Patrician’ perfection, chocolate conversationalist, cute ‘caboose’, all! Charming children (and incredible parents) that urge us all to be more amazing! We are eagerly following your adventures (from Lavender Sea, and Feisty Tortilla, to Goose and Gadgets), a ‘parallel universe’ that seems almost surreal (but for the fact that we know you are, indeed, real, and that your everyday experiences, trials and triumphs, just handled with such magnificence that you elevate all : )! I wish I had such well-worded wisdom to impart, but . . . alas . . . perhaps I may learn! For now, mostly mucking around in Mississippi (beauty, as well, a world apart–more on that, someday : ) and striving to grasp and grow from wisdom all around (here, and across the great divide). And, as to stumbling, I am growing more skilled at that (particularly, in a more literal sense) . . . looked up your link to “A Blog About Love”—a rather compelling, indeed (and, between here and there, perhaps insight will inspire and meaningful moving will more fully infuse every aspect of my life) . . . How fitting and sweet that Mara Kofoed’s “Love Announcements” today made reference to this lovely post . . . We “think you’re awesome,” too. And you, “mom,” are “amazing :) .”

Peggy October 30, 2012 at 10:16 pm

Becky,
Charmed by your daughter’s initiative to lead the way with her choice to love. Just like Danny and Mara, your family is inspiring too! Thank you for sharing your experiences with such eloquence and cheer.
Blessings on your ex-pat adventures!
Peggy

Becky October 31, 2012 at 10:05 am

Peggy, thanks for the good wishes. Blessings right back!–and besitos, too.

Kelli Anderson November 24, 2012 at 11:30 pm

i love a blog about love! love this post!

Becky November 26, 2012 at 1:33 am

Kelli, thanks for checking in. I love A Blog About Love too! Their voices really reverberate in the life of my older daughter, who LOVES what they have to say. And I love their themes, too. See all the “love” popping up here in my reply?–all because of ABAL? So powerful.

Happy Monday!

Becky

Comments on this entry are closed.

{ 1 trackback }

Previous post:

Next post: